If you did something wrong and have broken the law;
if you witnessed a crime but won’t tell what you saw;
if a jury of peers labels you as a crook –
but you did it for me – I’ll let you off the hook.
I have spoken of Mueller with nothing but scorn,
so I’ll make that man wish he had never been born
by commuting or pardoning all he convicted
(that I’d take such an action has long been predicted).
And once again – something now done three or four times –
I’ve pardoned some people convicted of war crimes.
A pox against rule of law I brought upon us, when
I wiped the slate clean for three former congressmen.
It’s my right to pardon and exercise free will,
which I’ve done by trashing the Covid relief bill.
I’ll take steps long thought to be crass and forbidden,
and bet any veto won’t be overridden.
I came into office through vowing disruption,
but one thing continues: my links to corruption.
Toward cronies I’ll fawn and show favoritism
in hopes that I won’t spend next Christmas in prison.
The Trump Poems 