It’s time to open up again – there’s no more to be done.
Enough of being cautious; now it’s time to have some fun.
Just maintain social distance and forget about a mask source,
While I plan to start distancing my own self from my task force.
We’ll focus more on opening; a little less on safety.
We’ve had enough of careful – now, let’s all embrace the hasty.
The goal I’m setting heretofore: return to what were fine times.
We’ve had enough austerity, so disregard my guidelines.
Will people be affected badly? Yes, that’s surely true.
But keep your fingers crossed it’s someone else, instead of you.
It’s possible more folks will die; that fact should not surprise,
But that means there’ll be less to whom we’ll need to give supplies.
We’ve made tremendous progress – if, by “progress,” you mean “failure.”
But time to end the lockdown, with the government as jailer.
I’m going to let you go and get tattoos and drink in pubs.
And trust me: I’ll go crazy if I can’t soon swing some clubs.
The cure, as I have said before, can’t be worse than the problem.
My message should be cheerful; I don’t do too well with solemn.
I say we’ll bounce back quickly, but I pin it all on vague hopes.
If that means twice as many die, well – that’s the price you’ll pay, folks.