Did you have a nice Christmas? Mine was a bit lacking,
Since we aren’t sure if North Korea’s attacking.
My pal Chairman Kim said he’d leave the selection
To me for my Christmas gift. Impact: election.
And then there’s impeachment, which hangs overhead while
The Congress debates rules for this watershed trial.
He won’t be impartial: McConnell made that pledge, he
Will stiff-arm Pelosi — at least, that’s his strategy.
A Christmastime message I chose to deliver. It
Was, mostly: “Dems are all liars and hypocrites.”
Security-wise, Dems make claims I’m a threat,
Since I function as Putin’s marionette.
Republican voters? Pelosi sure hates them.
I think she is crazy, and not such a great femme.
I’ll open my mouth and keep putting my foot in
Each time I attack, via Twitter, this woman.
My stocking was hung by the chimney with care,
But then, Christmas morning – Kim’s vase wasn’t there.
I’m told, “Behave nicely!” like that’s an assumptive goal,
When all I receive every year is a lump of coal.