Cramming Testimony

Vindman showed up in a uniform I’ve chosen to make fun of,
Issued to him by a fighting force that I was never one of.
And that woman sitting next to him? I’ll tell you what my sense is:
She’s a Never Trumper – even though a staffer of Mike Pence’s.

They both said they were distressed by what they’d heard on that discussion,
Where perhaps I’d make it harder for the Ukes to fight the Russians
Unless I could get Zelenskyy to commit to digging into
Some bullshit regarding Crowdstrike; what the Bidens might have been through.

In the afternoon, the GOP was finally permitted
To bring in a couple witnesses, whose statements had acquitted
Me of any hint of scandal – but the only problem there was
That their public testimony offered less chance than a prayer does.

The ambassador named Volker kind of danced around the issue,
As he opened with a narrative where he said he would wish to
Modify his prior testimony; now he says he sees a
Probe of Biden “unacceptable,” no linkage to Burisma.

Tim Morrison proclaimed he had a fear the call’s disclosure
Wouldn’t play well within Washington; perhaps not thought as kosher
Since I’d frozen aid to Ukraine – and if that happened to leak out
It would trigger a kerfuffle, causing Democrats to speak out.

Devin Nunes once again proclaimed the hearings as a circus.
(It’s a tossup between him and Jordan who the bigger jerk is.)
While my allies have proclaimed, “It’s over!” – shouting from the rostrum,
Other witnesses like these perhaps I can’t afford the cost from.

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