It’s National Adoption Month, so I propose to you:
Let’s adopt new guidelines for those LGBTQ.
For faith-based groups who ask for fed’ral funding I will raise hopes,
Since I plan to permit discrimination against gay folks.
For agencies involved with finding homes for lonely cherubs,
The funding that Obama stopped, you may now get a share of.
I’m planning on reversing his decree you found so vexing,
Restoring grants you lost if you’re opposed to homosexing.
From Health and Human Services now comes a new direction:
Don’t have to deal with gays; just have to claim faith-based objection.
This means discrimination can be codified above
The needs of displaced children who are merely desperate to be loved.
There’s some religious folk who say, according to the Psalms,
That children will do best in homes with married dads and moms.
If man lies with a man as with a woman – that’s ungodly.
(Perhaps that’s why they tolerate my womanizing, oddly.)
Some agencies embrace those in the rainbow coalition,
With sexuality not detrimental to their mission.
Let gays go deal with them – I’m focused on the more religious ones.
The rule that I’m proposing seems to be the least litigious one.
It’s clear that Bible-thumper votes I’m trying to solicit.
An application from two gays? It’s OK to dismiss it.
This rule gives faith-based groups the right to settle on refusin’ –
Since nothing quite says “family” like laws based on exclusion.