I called into Sean Hannity, my favorite Fox News host.
We spoke of the economy (I love a chance to boast).
But most of our discussion, if you chose to muddle through,
Was how the Special Counsel really tried to stage a coup.
Like in a Third World country; inconceivable to me –
As if they stormed the palace and then into jail threw me.
I like to turn it right up to “11” when on Hannity,
So didn’t fear I sounded like I’d lost my grip on sanity.
Those texts between two lovers from the FBI? A roadmap.
You know that I was spied upon – Obama had my phone tapped.
Those FISA applications? I’ll have them declassified;
If Rosenstein misled the court, then man – his ass is fried.
Messrs. Clapper, Brennan, Comey tried to cripple my campaign.
And someone from the DNC hooked up with the Ukraine.
Everywhere I look I find another dark conspiracy;
Efforts to connect the dots lead me to incoherency.
My genius comes in twisting facts to favor circumstance.
I have the highest I.Q. you can have – and it’s enhanced
With just a little bit of hunch mixed with a little bit of wisdom.
You’ve heard of idiot savants? Well, there’s a chance I is one.