Wanna be my Chief of Staff?
The kind of job that you would like.
We’ll shed a tear, we’ll share a laugh –
Until I say, “Go take a hike.”
I tweeted at Obama once:
So many Chiefs, he lost his groove.
That makes me now look like a dunce –
Of which, you know, I don’t approve.
The first guy who served in this role
Has seemingly now disappeared.
He’s prob’ly looking for his soul
Which he surrendered to work here.
So then, I named a general:
His résumé seemed quite distinguished.
His tenure proved ephemeral;
His reputation now extinguished.
I really thought I found a guy –
He works for Pence, just down the hall –
But “I decline” was his reply.
That cast o’er my search quite a pall.
My people floated several names,
But for the role there’s been no clamor.
Weighing whether worth the fame
When my wrath comes down like a hammer.
Need to turn this ship around,
Deal with my Othello rages.
If the next one turns me down
I’ll search through the Yellow Pages.
Hoping you’re a person who
Will not flip your wig with me.
Then I’ll put my curse on you
And POOF! There goes your dignity.