Monday? I’ve Got Friday On My Mind

I’ll send Stephen Miller to check out that caravan.
He won’t let just anyone through; must be Aryan.
There’s two hundred people requesting asylum —
They’re fleeing oppression, but I just revile ‘em.

Some people climbed up to the top of the fence.
To deal with this onslaught, I ordered Mike Pence
To survey this issue, with his steely gaze —
And then head to L.A., so he could fundraise.

Back home in DC, I appeared with Buhari.
For comments once made I did not offer, “Sorry!”
To celebrate his trip from far-off Nigeria
I treated for lunch — at White House cafeteria.

When asked about travel ban, I said that I’m
Convinced an apology’s not worth one thin dime.
I said, “laughing at,” “a disaster,” “stupidity.”
(I was referencing laws; wasn’t referencing me.)

And all of a sudden my pal David Pecker,
Notorious as an integrity-wrecker,
Attacks Michael Cohen, with whom I did business.
(I don’t know him well – just a quick card at Christmas.)

From Israel, word comes from B. Netanyahu:
Iran has been lying, to which I say, “Wahoo!”
Since Bibi’s my friend, I’ll take him at his word
And trash that agreement, which I found absurd.

And then there’s that leak, to the failed New York Times;
Some questions regarding, allegedly, crimes
Re: obstruction of justice, when I fired Jimmy.
I said I would answer, but that’s not a gimme.

And all of this happened on just one day – Monday!
I cannot recall when I last had a fun day.
Perhaps when I sat in the cab of that truck…
But since then: oh, boy – I’ve been shit out of luck.

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