Rick’s Role

I went to the heartland of PA two times, to stump for this guy, Rick Saccone,
While trying to make sure my 20-point edge against Hillary wouldn’t be blown.
And now that the votes have been counted, it looks like he *just* lost to Lamb.
(Who was a Marine and a U.S. Attorney; I publicly called him a “sham.”)

But push come to shove – this was not about me. Rick’s campaign skills were, we shall say, lacking.
Four terms in the Statehouse – I’d think all those years would have sharpened his skills at attacking.
But he didn’t go for the jugular, or take up his chances to trash.
Instead, he campaigned wearing polo shirts – and wouldn’t shave off that stupid porn ‘stache.

As the polls showed support was eroding, perhaps thinking his strategy flawed,
He got tough: said the Dems hate “our country,” “our President,” and – quite redundantly – “God.”
So there in the midst of “Steel Country” – with the tariffs I gave to renew it –
He took that big, beautiful, wellspring of love people have for me and… man, he blew it.

While behind the scenes I may be seething, out in public I’m a bon vivant.
I’m still focused on getting the best of what’s left for the Cabinet I really want.
Since now Rick, and my man Roy from ‘Bama, won’t inaugurate into the Congress,
They can join me in two years: we’ll criss-cross the country and gleefully trash Pocahontas.